Today's Borowitz Report, passed on without comment:
UPDATE: Birthers And Borowitz Aside, Hate Talk Radio On The Attack Against Snowe
Just as Senate Republican Caucus leaders Miss McConnell and Jon Kyl were announcing that there was nothing they could do to stop Olympia Snowe and other mainstream conservatives from busting the radical right's obstructionist blockage from time to time, Hate Talk Radio hosts like Limbaugh and Savage went on a rampage against Snowe. And Limbaugh gratuitously kicked Susan Collins-- and women in general-- in the teeth for good measure. These people are sick.
And they never learn! While the radical right fringe is undermining the mainstream conservative candidate in the upstate NY special election (Dede Scozzafava), the Democrat, Bill Owens, has jumped into the #1 position. If radical right kooks like Mike Pence are able to sabotage Scozzafava effectively enough, Owens will be the first Democrat to win the NY-23 seat since the Civil War (the real one, not the GOP one).
GOP Claims Olympia Snowe Was Born in Kenya
Birthers Demand Proof of Non-Kenyan StatusWASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - Just moments after she broke with fellow Republicans and voted in favor of health care reform, Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-ME) came under fire from the GOP for allegedly lying about her nation of birth.
"This vote is going to raise suspicions, once again, that Sen. Snowe was born in Kenya," said GOP Chairman Michael Steele. "We demand that she prove, once and for all, that she is definitely not Kenyan."
Orly Taitz, leader of the so-called "birther" movement, said that Sen. Snowe's vote was "textbook Kenyan" behavior: "She's putting her tribe first."
In other news, conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh said he would acquire the St. Louis Rams and rename their stadium The House of Painkillers.
Limbaugh's move came after a failed bid to acquire Minnesota's NFL franchise and rename it the Minnesota Vicodins.
Elsewhere, the Rev. Moon married 10,000 people, putting him slightly ahead of Liza Minnelli.
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UPDATE: Birthers And Borowitz Aside, Hate Talk Radio On The Attack Against Snowe
Just as Senate Republican Caucus leaders Miss McConnell and Jon Kyl were announcing that there was nothing they could do to stop Olympia Snowe and other mainstream conservatives from busting the radical right's obstructionist blockage from time to time, Hate Talk Radio hosts like Limbaugh and Savage went on a rampage against Snowe. And Limbaugh gratuitously kicked Susan Collins-- and women in general-- in the teeth for good measure. These people are sick.
And they never learn! While the radical right fringe is undermining the mainstream conservative candidate in the upstate NY special election (Dede Scozzafava), the Democrat, Bill Owens, has jumped into the #1 position. If radical right kooks like Mike Pence are able to sabotage Scozzafava effectively enough, Owens will be the first Democrat to win the NY-23 seat since the Civil War (the real one, not the GOP one).
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